In Madness, There is Life...

I'm learning life is simply what it is.  Life.  Whether life comes to you easily or whether it comes to you hard, it's just life.  It is what it is.  For some people, it's a welcoming pleasure to live-- they see the joy in another day and are excited to see what it will bring.  For others, it is simply a menacing weight tied tight around the neck, constricting and heavy.

It's a whole lot of luck.
It's being in the right place at the right time.
It's not what you make it at all-- it makes you.

It's madness.

It seems to me that life is living in the midst of the madness; it's how you react and live IN the madness.  The choices you make, make you.

There is no reason for how things work out (or don't work out for that matter), there is no rhyme to how life is lived or how you finish out.  It's a pure roll of the dice, an absolute chaotic spin and chance seems to be the only true outcome.

So, why bother with living within the bad circumstances, hoping for better when the odds are consistently against?  Believe me, I've asked myself the same thing.  I struggle with it everyday.  And this is the only answer I've come to understand:

If there is any chance whatsoever of a possibility of something good happening in my life, I will do everything in my power to be available for that good thing.  I will live my life well, being the best person I know to be.  I will not give in to the darkness that constantly surrounds me and overcomes me to become any less of a person.  Even though, I've not seen much of what most would call "good" in my life, I will not give up my belief that something better can still happen.

Some days the madness overwhelms.